The Freedom of Motherhood

As I lay in bed restless after a busy day…I start to think about how transformative the past two months have been.  Prior to becoming a mom, I had read so many times that when you have a baby you become a new person. You “lose a part of who you were”. I pause to reflect to see if I feel this shift. And I do. I do feel different. But how? It doesn’t feel different in a bad way. Although not explicitly saying it; everything I had read made me perceive this shift to be a bad thing. Like I would be losing all the good things about myself. But when I pause to really think about just HOW I feel different…the first word that comes to mind is FREE.

Which is funny, and seems like a complete paradox. In so many ways I have temporarily lost a part of my freedom. It is not as easy to leave the house whenever I need, go out to dinner, or go meet up with my friends. But I’m free in that my perspective on what matters is so clear. All the silly little things I used to worry about no longer have space in my mind. Whether it be silly stresses of my job, or any sort of dramas…it’s like the worries of those things magically vanished. It’s like not realizing how bad your vision is until you put on your first pair of glasses. You are amazed at how clear the world is. What’s a priority and what doesn’t matter has never been more clear to me. Who I am outside of being a mom has never been clearer.

I want to spend all of my time with her. I want to be  present for every little moment because I know it goes by fast. With that, I know that anything or anyone I give my time to are things or people I love and love us. I don’t feel like I lost all the good things about myself. I lost all the little silly worries that occupied my mind. I am more present in the moments with my family.

Becoming a mom has given me purpose.

Becoming a mom has given me clarity.

Becoming a mom has given me FREEDOM.

- Anonymous